Martini Momma

Farewell, Mommas and Martinis

Well, the day has come. 

It's been in the works for a while but the big day has arrived.  The day that I, too, am saying farewell to The Martini Mommas.  I like familiarity, I like being comfy, I don't look for change if I don't have to.  I hang on to my favorite jeans long after they stop hugging the right places, I would have driven my favorite old civic forever had the front tire not fallen off, I don't stray far from my bob haircut with the straw colored "natural" highlights.  That's me, I like what I like and I like when it feels like home.  That's how this site has felt to me.  I loved being a part of the trio of mommas.  I loved every moment that I shared with Brandi and Kathryn and I loved the wealth of women that weighed in on anything from illness to discipline, fitness to food.  Home, that's how I felt.  Brandi moved on to a beautiful blog all her own, a place to grow that incredible writing style she has and Kath's blog turned into a business that suits her coaching talents beautifully.  They have found new homes and despite bringing my sister on board with me to share this corner of cyberspace with me, it just never really felt like home to her.  We were no longer the mommas and frankly, we prefer wine to martinis any day of the week.  We came to the conclusion that we love this forum, we love sharing stories, we love the idea of moms sharing and commiserating at times.  Mostly, we love being able to share our kidlets with all of you, it's a journal of sorts that we want to carry on.  We need to find a new home.  We have to say goodbye to the Martini Mommas.  Come along for the ride, there is a new passenger and a new home. 

Farewell, Martini Mommas! 

Hop on board and ask yourself, Are We There Yet?  and save this link to your favorites http://arewethereyetblog.typepad.com

See you there!

And the little one said.....mama

My littlest baby is near and dear to my heart these days.  Literally, she would spend every moment if she could, snuggled up in my arms.  I went for a run the other day and the little turkey spent 45 minutes in her daddy's arms wailing and calling out for her "mama".  It doesn't stop when the lights go out.  This morning, she woke at 5, after a fitful sleep peppered with coughing fits.  I felt a nudge to my back to rouse me and tell me, "she's calling for you".  Ain't that convenient?  I went and though I tried to sneak out without her in my arms, the moment I closed the door and heard the muffled whimper of a babe in need of some snuggles from her mom, I was putty.  I took her into my bed and though I was up till all hours working on something EXTREMELY EXCITING that I am dying to show you all, I was actually quite content to bring that little darling into bed.  I held her so tightly and would have gladly held on to that moment forever.  The truth is at her age, you don't really know how many of those middle of the night mama calls there are going to be.  Ty hasn't had one in years and Mags, well, frankly she prefers her Daddy's snuggles.  So, I'll take the love and adoration from my wee-est little babe and I will enjoy these fading moments of being her number 1.  Frankly, I'm just as in love with her.  How could I not be?

On a side note:  What can I do for a coughing 2 year old?  Nothing?  She is up all night coughing her brains out, what is there for her?  Suggestions?

 

Smiling on a Life

I was driving to work today when it dawned on me.  Today marks 5 years since the day my mom passed away.  I think of her in big moments and in tiny details, so today's anniversary is not the one that rings the loudest.  5 years have passed in the blink of an eye and in the same breathe those 5 years have moved slowly enough that details I thought were a part of me forever have faded from sight.  I can't remember the time of day it was, I think morning.  Dad and I were there, after a long and emotionally taxing overnight spent at her side.  I can't remember what the day looked like. In my mind it was dreary, drizzling, cold and miserable...was it really or was that my mind's intepretation?  I remember her hand, I remember holding it and trying to take in every small detail.  I look at my hands at least every couple of days and try to conjure up hers to see if I inherited her beautiful hands.  I loved her hands and her nails, they always looked like they were french manicured. I can see myself overwrought with grief.  I sometimes wonder how we made it out to our cars, who drove home?  I wonder if people saw us in the elevator and knew without knowing that we had just lost our mom.  Did we cry?  I know exactly what I wore to her funeral, down to the Franco Sarto shoes I bought that I know she would have loved but what did I say in that eulogy, I have no idea.  Time heals. And while I know the pain I felt in that moment was unbearable, I can't feel it anymore.  Like labor pain, you know it was there but the ache and the intensity dulls with time to the point where you wonder what did it really feel like?  I feel a longing at times that is like an itch that I can't seem to reach.  I still find moments where I want to reach for the phone and tell her something, share one of the tiny details of motherhood that she would want to share so intimately with me.  When those moments come, they are always followed by the wave of sadness that hits me head on that she isn't here. On this day, I feel sadness, I guess being the anniversary of someone's passing is a hard thing to celebrate.  On most other days, I smile and feel a warmth and remembrance as I think of the woman that I loved so very much.  Her girls, my sister and I carry her proudly at all times.  We smile when we think of her, we make frantic calls to her beloved Bon Apetit magazine for recipes that we think may have disappeared with her.  We search madly for pictures to prove that yes, our children do bear strong resemblance to their grandmother.  We laugh about her and we find ways to bring her into our lives EVERY day.  We long for her company and we keep her many traditions alive for ourselves and for our wee ones.  November 2nd marks the start of her season, Christmas,  done only the way my could have done.  My tree will go up this week and I will be reminded, as I hang my own children's ornaments and the ones that Dad has passed onto us, of mom and the excitement she created in our home. 

I didn't know 5 years ago that time can heal a heart.  I didn't know that I would wake one day and not feel the heavy burden on my heart.  I never imagined a time where I could smile through tears. I am proud of our family, of Dad and Judy, Katie, Jerry and our newest little Ivy, of my little clan, Chad and the kids.  I am proud of our resiliance, I am proud of our bond, I am impressed by our ability to grow together in tragedy.  I am most proud that we keep Mom a part of our world, alive through the memories we continue to share.

Nothing like a little shot of sugar before bed

So, Halloween has come and gone again.  I made it through the lootbags (yes, I made them).  Yes, I managed to find something clever with the cupcakes (48 of them, 4 different designs)  Does black icing always have a slightly bitter taste? 

 
Witches with Hershey kiss hats and skulls for the little man in our house.

 
Eyeballs and pumpkins.  All you need is a trip to the bulk barn!

 
Here's my little crew, ready to go!  Please mom, don't make us do a photo shoot before we go!  The smiles are only a result of my threats to cancel Halloween altogether if I didn't get one picture where they all look in the same direction.  Not my direction, apparently! 

 
There's our little Ivy, trick or treating for the first time ever.  She was awake for this picture and not much more.  I would have liked her seat, bundled up in the bucket seat sleeping soundly.  I love that these cousins get to experience all this together, looks like Sadie feels the same way!

 
So now you see that Sadie has a hard time sharing her little " Beebee Ivy". The crying ceased as soon as she got to hold her little babe.  Take a look, Ivy's in there somewhere!  Man, is she laid back!

 
The kids lasted longer than I thought, they have more candy than they know what to do with and I have eaten more than I had promised myself.  The wagon was filled to the brim and that suited this cozy little darling cozy and comfy.  So fun...so glad it's over!

It's a Howl, Isn't it?

Last night, post massage, Brandi and I discussed the upcoming Halloween holiday.  Is Halloween a holiday?  I don't know.  It's certainly not my favorite.  I coined it as a speed bump on the way to Christmas.  It's a neccessity to get through before starting the Christmas countdown.  My jets are burning thinking about the tree that will go up next week and all this Halloween stuff that the kids still are eager about.  Kids love this one, don't they? 

Costumes are ready, Maggie will be Belle, Sadie will be a darling little ladybug, and Ty will be a Star Wars fighter pilot.  I, on the other hand, have no costume and really that's OK with me.  I'll come up with something for school but the creative juices just aren't flowing.  As the kids get older, it seems that the amount of work that goes into this event grows and grows.  This year, I need baked treats for Maggie and Sadie at daycare, Ty's before school, Maggie's preschool.  Wow!  Never mind, some fool started a precedent years ago of also sending a little loot bag to daycare as well. Who's the genius?  So, I'm in the panic bake mode, deciding what to bake.  I was thinking cupcakes, only to remember that I'm out of eggs and doing baking and icing on the same night, tough task.  So, what can I make tomorrow night?  Any brilliant ideas out there? 

Race to the Finish

Our weekend was comprised of dashes and sprints.  Friday night took me on an "Amazing Race" around the streets of Winnipeg in a car rally of sorts.  Wolfing down ice cream, dressing in Walmart Halloween costumes, scavenging around the Norwood Bridge, wow, it was a race to the finish that ended at the Tavern United downtown.  It was a race that I did NOT win but it was an absolute blast! 

Saturday started early as the tiniest TimBits seem to get the bright and eager start times.  Who decided this, I know my little TimBit still needs his rest and that early start can throw a whole day off kilter.  No sense fighting it, so he goes and plays his little heart out.  Rush home.  Chad makes quick Home Depot run to get the 14 light bulbs that seem to have burnt out simultaneously.  Rush home.  Dart out the door for a much needed hair cut for Ty.  I don't know about you but I don't think this whole Justin Bieber hair cut phase is very cool.  I think with that mop top, Ty looked like he had a set of neglectful parents, thank you but I will stick to the clean cut, slightly spiky do.  Rush home.  Madly wrap present for birthday party.  Rush out the door to drop off two oldest kiddies at their cousin's birthday.  Rush home.  Tuck sleeping tot into her bed for a nap.  Head out for a nice long run on a beautiful sunny day.  Check stopwatch 1300 times to make sure I am allowing enough time to return to the party to pick up kids.  Check again, increase speed slightly, check watch again, all out sprint to the finish to make it home in time.  Race to the Y for pick up from party.  The weekend carried on at this pace, Chad and I passing each other like ships in the harbor.  More birthday parties, more activities, more errands, and to end it off, my husband abandoned me for another business trip to Tennessee.  Not his choice but I'm abandoned nonetheless.  We did manage a DELICIOUS meal with old friends.  Looking around the table at the 10 of us and a history that stems back to grade 10, it was a night full of laughs and reminiscing.  Thanks, Luci!

I wondered when this pace became the norm in our household.  I thought about the Saturdays that my sister and I trailed behind my mom EVERY single weekend as she shopped and perused the sales at Polo Park, Eatons to be specific.  We always did lunch and always had coffee at Second Cup.  When I was blessed with my two girls, I fastforwarded time and imagined us having leisurely Saturdays together, shopping and enjoying our girl time.  As I sit here in reality, I wonder if there will ever be days like these or if every moment of weekend time will be filled with birthdays and activities.  I wonder if every Monday will bring a sigh of relief that we can once again be back on schedule.  Welcome Monday, I am glad to see you!

Hot Debates....Not This Time!

I'm not sure why some weeks I feel as if I am behind the eight ball all week.  Each day feels like a struggle to keep on top of the laudry, the activities, the clean up.  It's as if one small (or not so small) actvity sets me into a tailspin.  This past weekend, it was Ty's birthday.  Yes, Uputtz did an amzing job at taking care of everything but it was still an evening I devoted to the cake and a full day of celebrating the big event.  Needless to say, I've been in catch up mode, trying to fit in groceries and all that jazz.  Not stressed, not unhappy, just not quite at the top of the hill looking down....yet!  I believe that my life would be perfect if only I could have one day off a week to stay home and devote time to our homelife.  Oh, to live in a perfect world where your employer would grant your request for 1 day off per cycle. 

I took yesterday afternoon to tote my kidlets along to the doctors.  Armed with the best cup of tea from Sisters Leap Teas, Caramel Apple.  It is so delicious, I have actually ventured successfully from my standard peppermint favorite.  Dying to try the Cranberry Pomegranate, sounds very festive.  Sorry for the sidetrack but it really is THAT great!  Anyway, armed with tea, I was prepared for the wait.  We headed in and were told that we could receive our flu shots at the same time.  No biggie.  I demonstrated a brave patient only to find that I actually squeezed my nails into Sadies little thighs while trying to fake it.  Nice mom!  Ty was up next and literally went beserk.  Is being terrified of needles an inherited trait.  Maggie hopped up, took the needle and then went beserk and little Sades, no fear, no problem.  Like their personalities, they took their doses.  The thing is I left and realized that last year at about this time, we were having forums, hot, highly debated forums right here on the blog about whether to vaccinate or not, whether to get flu and H1N1 or just flu??  Hot topics, I recall.  Yesterday, I walked in, the doctor suggested it, I trust her, I took it and so did the kids.  Decision made in 1.2 minutes. I left and am not even sure if it contained H1N1 or not?  Last year wore down my apprehension, no side effects, no illness, so I did it again.  I just thought it was funny to see how as I age as a mother, I make fewer mountains out of these decisions and just go with the "flow".  Let's hope it was the right decision or at least works in keeping the flu at bay for a while.  What's everyone else doing?  Wait, maybe don't tell me or I'll start to second guess that rash decision making.

My Little Pumpkins

All I can say before this weary body heads off to bed is that we've been busy.  Very busy.  But not to busy to take in the pumpkin near our house with my 2 girlies.  It was a treat for just the "girrrs" while Ty practiced and Daddy coached the East St. Paul Red Hawks Tim Bits team.  Take a look!

 

 

 

 
 
 

Oops....Forgot that part!

I've been feeling pretty cocky lately, events are listed on the calendar, forms from school are completed and returned, hockey schedule is not overwhelming us.  Smooth sailing.  Ty's 6th birthday is tomorrow, party is planned for U Puttz.  I like this place, they take care of everything, loot bags, food, invites, EVERYTHING.  The man told me just bring the kids and the cake.  I can take care of that.  A Hockey Rink cake.  Easy, peasy.  2 rectangular layer cakes, iced to look like a rink with the players from his stick hockey game plunked in the top. I stopped and bought all ingredients on the way home, Grey's Anatomy and baking....a perfect night.  Grey's is a repeat.  Bad News.  No worries, I'll watch the PVRed version of Parenthood instead.  Box cake mixes....making life easier, nothing wrong with that...but oops I bought Angel Food confetti instead of supermoist rainbow bits.  Enter Chad....first trip to Sobey's.  Katie calls, crisis has been averted, knee deep in cake mix I am.  "That's awesome, you're making cake for Ty to take to his class tomorrow."  Sinking feeling sets in.  I forgot that part.  Ok, scramble, scramble, so I need to make something he can share with his class.  Monster cookies are his fave, so we'll do that.  Enter Chad...second trip to Sobey's...this time for a giant bag of Smarties, you can't do monster cookies without.  The most beautiful part of this story is when hubby willingly offeredto go for the second time and did NOT complain.  All he said was, "Ty is really lucky you're his mom."  Good, good man!  3 hours later, we have 2 cakes waiting in the freezer to be iced hockey style, 30 cookies packed in his backpack.  He woke this morning to this surprise and he was over the moon, bouncing off the walls to get his day going.  It made the 3 hours I stood in that kitchen baking and cleaning worth every moment.  Next stop....glow-in-the-dark mini-golf with 14 kiddos.  Good times, I tell you!

The Practical Exam

I feel like Grade 1 is a test.  A test that we have been prepping for over the last 5 years.  Suddenly, Ty has escaped my clutches and now spends the vast majority of his day apart from his parents, in school instead.  He spends 1 hour at a before school home care setting, but I have little to no idea what goes on there.  I don't really know what he does for that hour, only that he would rather eat at home than at her house.  I'm puzzled about this one....but glad that I can still control what gets into his little body before he starts his day.  He walks with a group to school that I can't supervise.  I can only hope that the million times we told him to look both ways and follow closely to the leader has paid off.  I hope he'll remember his jacket each day and I hope that his backpack isn't too heavy for him.  Will he run into the road, chasing someone?  Will he keep up?  It's let-go time and grade 1 pushes that envelope.  Suddenly his lunch choices, while packed by me, are up to him.  No one is there to ensure that the cucumbers get eaten first and that the granola bar is saved for "dessert".  I know we have talked endlessly about food choices this year, the idea of putting good "fuel" in  your body.  I think he hears blah, blah, blah.  But really, it's the first time that there hasn't been an adult there to remind him to finish the milk and throw away his garbage.  Has he learnt enough in the years we prepped him.  It's an all-day everyday test to see if we parented wisely, setting the groundwork for his success.  Does he include others at recess, is he a leader, a follower?  Does he make good choices about the rights and wrongs of playground etiquette?  I can no longer guide his friendship choices or intercept when I see unfair play.  It's tough to sit on the sidelines and see it unfold.  I like to be in the mix but suddenly, I have to rely on coaching from the sidelines.  I've been waiting for this independence to come and yet, I wuish with all my might that I could keep him in my clutches just a little longer.